Glimmers of Goodness
If we can locate a few good things happening in out life experience right now, we won’t have to fabricate those smiles even if they are somewhat fleeting. And when life seems most hopeless, we might find a small particle of hope in remembering those few good moments and stir within us a rekindled hope that we might have some other good moments in the future too.
I think in most says, to say that these are unsettled times would be a huge understatement. As I sit writing this a major war is being waged in Ukraine, many portions of the world are still stricken by COVID-19, and in my own country, partisan polarization is leading to real threats to the very foundations of the government.
During such times, it can be awfully easy to be uneasy. The thing that strikes me so often though is the fact that although all of these very distressing realities are clear and present threats, my day to day life and living doesn’t get impacted much. I still go to work. I still work on the same kinds of projects. I still travel to be with family. I still read good books and eat good and safe food in my comfortable home in my well-established city. And if that all wasn’t enough, we’re even moving into the dry and sunny season in the Northwest so the prospects are good that I’ll enjoy sunny, relatively warm days ahead.
I know all of this logically, but emotionally, hearing news reports of atrocities in foreign lands or my own, struggling to know how best to assist with the very perplexing challenges of our day, and while still keeping up a positive outlook on life can be a very hard thing to pull off. Ironically, we have a strong cultural push these days to be authentic but we also have a strong cultural push to smile often and see the pride side of situations. Making lemonade out of lemons. If we choose to be fully authentic when we are struggling, we face the risk of losing face or having people look at us differently. If we paint on a happy face and choose not to be fully authentic, we risk the chance of cracking under the pressure of living up to expectations. So what to do?
Clearly, I am still navigating this challenge myself, but one thing that has been extremely helpful for me over the last couple of years is to focus on the ultra real and tangible good things in my life right now. Right now, I’m typing these words on my balcony while a gentle breeze rustles through the trees, clad in their new summer coat of lush green leaves. I hear children laughing and screaming with delight from the park next door which this time of the year is full of kids taking advantage of the publish splash pad. I have a cup of iced yerba mate at my side and my body feels reasonably healthy and not in too much noticeable pain. In this moment, I’m not being threatened or being made to feel badly about myself. Today, I did reasonably good work for my job, and that leaves me with a residual good feeling. All in all, my life is rich and good. There are certainly things I would change if I could both broadly with things like international politics and there are things I would change within my own situation if I could. But within my sphere of influence, I’m doing okay.
Many of you who are reading this might be saying within yourself, “Sure, if I had things like you do, Chris, I’d be happy too. You have no idea how challenging my life is.” And you would be right: I don’t know what it is like to be you in the same moment. And I get the fact that it might come off as trite to say my life is going okay while so many of you might feel otherwise about your current situation. But I genuinely hope that all of us have some things that we all can point to as being good and tangible things that are a part of our current life experience right now. I have certainly had much worse days than this day in my life, but even in those moments there have been some good things to tap into even then.
If we can locate those few good things happening in out life experience right now, we won’t have to fabricate those smiles even if they are somewhat fleeting. And when life seems most hopeless, we might find a small particle of hope in remembering those few good moments and stir within us a rekindled hope that we might have some other good moments in the future too.