The Impossible Misunderstood Dream
No matter what the reason why we might not have followed the single track path driven by a passion, I think there are ways we can still get doses of the same kind of fulfillment. Maybe we can find joy in growing our own vegetables in a small garden or in committing to making a set up mugs and bowls on a pottery wheel for family or friends. Or maybe we try a bit harder to be fully present when talking to a friend that takes the conversation and the friendship to a new place or we get a glimpse of the joy of seeing a child experience something lovely for the first time and we celebrate in that discovery with them. Experiencing wonder is less about the magnitude of the undertaking and more about how much presence of mind we dedicate toward that undertaking.
I was thinking about a friend this morning who dropped his 10+ year career to follow a goal that he felt driven to accomplish. Through some ups and down, he is fulfilling his dream. And that’s led me to think about why his decision seems like such an anomaly when compared to most people’s life experience.
Most people I know don’t drop everything to write that novel that is burning inside them. Most don’t drop a lucrative job to help refugees while sleeping on couches along the way. Most of them look for jobs that will provide as much security and safety possible for themselves and their families and hopefully some fulfillment as well. So why don’t we all take that plunge and do what we dream of doing?
Well, I think there are several good reasons, though I’ll never downplay the sacrifice and commitment that drives those few who do drop things to follow some driving purpose. I honor and respect that. At the same time, I’ve come to believe that not everybody needs or wants to live that way and that’s okay too.
One reason why people don’t follow one set path in life may be because they haven’t found a cause or purpose that requires them to drop everything and follow it doggedly. I think in many ways, I fall into that camp myself. I care a lot about many causes and purposes, and i do draw meaning from my professional life. Is it my ultimate passion? The one r4eason why I’m existing upon this Earth? I don’t know if I’d go that far. The analogy I like to draw on is what would happen if someone like LeBron James had been born in Italy rather than in the United States. He’d be more likely to play soccer as a kid and might have dreams of playing professional soccer. Of course, his height wouldn’t be nearly as much of an advantage however and so he probably would end up doing something other than professional sports for work. Come to think of it, it’s a rare and wonderful thing when someone’s deepest passion can be extrapolated into a job that is in high enough demand that the person can get wealthy and famous by doing it.
Another reason is that a lot of people have other priorities that are not related to work in the traditional sense. For many, family is their top priority and if so, then they are willing to make the steps to ensure the safety and well-being of their family. And that is a very honorable way to live, too. They’re not giving up their dreams working jobs that aren’t exactly their passion in that situation, because they quite literally have other dreams that mean more to them.
And yet another reason might be because they are laying foundations for future generations to be in a better place to be able to choose to follow dreams. I think about so many of my ancestors who immigrated to the United States from Wales, England, and Germany with practically nothing but a hope for a better life for their kids and grandkids. Most of these stalwart individuals worked incredibly hard jobs like coal mining, factory worker, and fence builder and now because they were willing to work so hard to give their kids more opportunities than they had, I am a beneficiary. I’m among the first generations in my family line to get masters and doctorate degrees. But I’m also among the first generation that could choose to drop everything and follow a passion. Each family is in its own place in its historic path, and maybe you are one of the incredible people laying the foundation for future generations.
No matter what the reason why we might not have followed the single track path driven by a passion, I think there are ways we can still get doses of the same kind of fulfillment. Maybe we can find joy in growing our own vegetables in a small garden or in committing to making a set up mugs and bowls on a pottery wheel for family or friends. Or maybe we try a bit harder to be fully present when talking to a friend that takes the conversation and the friendship to a new place or we get a glimpse of the joy of seeing a child experience something lovely for the first time and we celebrate in that discovery with them. Experiencing wonder is less about the magnitude of the undertaking and more about how much presence of mind we dedicate toward that undertaking.